The Real Me
For me, the importance of self-love was something I did not discover until later in life. I grew up an external validation junkie, always searching for love outside myself. I married a man who had enough love for me that I did not need to put in the work. I gravitated toward service careers where others validated my worthiness and I lived as a slave to their perspectives. Fighting to be seen and championing outsiders for my worthiness was a deadly game. I knew there had to be a better way!
How I Got Here
My path shifted dramatically after I discovered coaching and made a commitment to become certified. As I went through the process, I was proud of the knowledge I had gained, but I was more fascinated by my own life transformation. My exploration into coaching began with a focus on empowerment, but after working with clients for a year, I discovered the need to begin at the surface and coach them on self-love principles. There’s nothing more gratifying to witness a client who rediscovers their authentic self and learns to love themselves unconditionally.
It was not until I lost my husband and became burnt out from the self-inflicted battles that I chose a different path. I decided to invest in uncovering the layers that had buried my worthiness. I became a coach; I hired my own coach; I committed to doing the soul work to discover who I was before the world labeled me who to be. Underneath the limiting beliefs, self-inflicted emotional wounds, and hurtful messages was a lost girl who needed to be loved. I made a pact to no longer gauge my self-worth on external factors. I committed to a love-affair with self. I slowly incorporated self-care rituals into my day, discovered simple pleasures I did not know I had, and took a year to “date” myself. When the love within began to emerge, I no longer sought validation from others, and I learned to trust myself. Handling the outcomes became so much easier because I had built a solid foundation of self-love, self-trust, and self-care.